Who You Are vs. Who You "Ought" to Be

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When's the last time you stopped to think about how much you've grown? How far you've come? How much you've changed? It's great to have goals, hopes and dreams, but sometimes we get so caught up in how we want to be that we begin to beat ourselves up for how we are. This leads to negative self-talk and low self-esteem. There was probably a time when you were scared to do what you are doing right now. You should celebrate yourself for that.

Perfection is not only unattainable; it leaves no room for improvement. Nevermind how anyone else thinks you "ought" to be. Remember that you are already whole and worthy of all good things. With every experience, you simply grow and become more aware of it.

Today, think about ways that people criticize you (or ways that you criticize yourself).  Take this opportunity to reaffirm all that you are right now at this moment in time. I'll go first:

My grandmother tells me that I ought to go to church more often, and I often feel guilty and misunderstood after our discussions.

With all due respect to my grandma, I only go to church occasionally and I've never felt more in tuned with God than I do now. Instead of feeling guilty about not going to church, I feel blessed to have a spiritual plan that works for me.

My impatient ego tells me that I ought to be writing for a living by now and that I'm getting old.

Everyday I must remind myself to stop and smell the roses and appreciate the journey. I've been working at the same company since I graduated from college, and I never imagined that I'd be handling the complex client relationships that I handle today. I'm fortunate to have a career that challenges me intellectually and supports my family. I am more than happy to ride this out as I explore my passion for writing and where it takes me.

Sometimes I feel inadequate because of my laid-back nature and wish that I was more aggressive.

There's something to be said for having the cognizance to pick and choose your battles. Aggressive behavior is not always a display of strength. The ability to bend and not break is severly underrated. I must remember to have confidence in my peaceful nature.

Please share yours in the comments. We are always inspired by your thoughts and stories!