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It doesn't seem fair when he cheated on you and now he's happily married and raising a family with the woman he cheated on you with. It stings when the job that fired you for unfounded reasons is growing in leaps and bounds and you are having trouble finding a job just to make ends meet.
Where's the retribution? Have you ever felt this way?
I have a couple friends going through these things and the common theme I hear voiced through their frustration is that they feel they are being punished. They don't understand why it seems that the people who have done them wrong are being rewarded.
Why do bad things happen to good people? No one on this earth can answer this question with certainty, but what I believe is that 1) What doesn't kill us makes us stronger or teaches us something we needed to learn 2) We won't get stronger if we view ourselves as victims and 3) When we've been wronged, we need to focus on our own healing and let go of our fixation with the person who hurt us.
I know it's not easy. I've been trying to think of ways to comfort my friends through these situations, and I keep hearing myself say "Let go. This is not about them, this is about you. Don't worry about what they think or if they are laughing at you or feeling sorry for you. The only thing you should be thinking about is how you will heal and move forward. Take the lesson and let it go."
Do you have any advice to share based on what you've been through? Are you going through something right now? Consider the following affirmations:
I am stronger and more resilient than I think I am.
My joy and peace of mind are not dependent on my current circumstances.
The quality of my life is defined by staying true to my values, no matter how others behave.
I don't need revenge or retribution to feel closure from a bad situation.
I can empower myself by not playing the victim, and looking at challenges as opportunities to overcome.
I believe in myself when no one else does.
I love myself unconditionally.
4 comments:
I so needed this.
Thanks ladies :)
xoxo,
daisy
OMGoodness! You are right on point. I've had to watch a very loose friend get married this year and another not so loyal friend get a job opportunity that I gave her the idea for and tried to get myself, but I was turned down. I'm always happy for the accomplishments of others; but when people who have mistreated you time and time again keep advancing and your stagnant, what are you supposed to think. I will put these afirmations in to practice. Thank you!
I am overjoyed at this moment to have discovered your blog. You are speaking to me. I am so glad to know that someone else who shares many of the same inner struggles is willing to express and exchange views through writing. It is often when we share with others that healing begins. Thank you for affirming to the world that we do not have to remain victims of our past struggles, disappointments and defeats. We have the power within to move forward.
Thank you, Ive been going through things like this lately and I was just stuck. I wanted revenge I wanted to get back at him, and then I just thought about it. Even though I was hurt I didn't want to hurt him, I felt embarrassed. I didn't want other peoples' pity. Oh Poor Girl, etc;. I knew I was a big girl. After reading this, I realized I didn't need to get back to feel better; I just needed to let go. And sure its difficult, but I think it'll be better in the end. I need to take care of me right now than try to hurt someone else.
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