The Beauty of Detachment

"There is nothing like returning to a place

that remains unchanged to find the ways

in which you yourself have altered."

Occasionally, I find myself back there - entertaining old feelings and insecurities and allowing them to take me back to old stomping grounds to which I swore I'd never return. Maintaining peace of mind is definitely not a "set it and forget it" concept. So many times, I've thought that I'd overcome something - only to be presented with similar circumstances and find myself reacting the same way.

One of the things I struggle with is attachment. Sometimes it's hard accepting people for who they are, what they do and the ups and downs that they go through. At times, I get so caught up in my feelings for people that I take their idiosyncracies very personally and I find myself hurting because of what they are doing or not doing and how it makes me feel.

I get lost in the in-between of loving with all my heart but still remaining detatched enough to stay in control of my own peace and happiness. It's easy for me to talk about how much I've grown and how far I've come when everything is peachy. The true test comes when people disappoint me, plans fall through, and my boundaries are threatened.

I want things to go my way all the time - no spills, no oversights, no wardrobe malfunctions. But alas, to live such a life is not living at all, is it? How would we ever appreciate the light of day, if we never had to endure the darkness?

There is a reason that life continues to present these situations to me. There is a Divine plan unfolding for me, and I see every incident that comes into my life as a clue into my own mystery.

And so should you.

Nothing in life happens by accident. If people and events in your life are stirring your emotions to the point of distraction, it's a sign that you need to take a good look at yourself in that area.

As for me, I can't count how many times in my life that my attachment issues have gotten in the way of me focusing on what really matters - namely, THAT WHICH I CAN CONTROL. The difference between now and then is that place, full of fear and self-pity, is no longer an acceptable escape for me. Each time I go there, I'm reminded of why I keep leaving, and my stays are becoming shorter and shorter.

Excerpt from Thick Face, Black Heart by Chin-Ning Chu:

"There is no power higher than the power of detachment. When one masters the state of detachment, nothing he possess will possess him....Have you ever noticed when you stop wanting something, the object of your desire comes to you naturally? This is part of the mystery of how the world works."