Thursday, June 14, 2012

Celebrate Fathers. Celebrate Fatherhood.

Fathers are under appreciated in Black-American culture.

Maybe it is the fact that many of us (myself included) grew up without a father. Or maybe it is because some of the guys who are fathers are minimally involved in the lives of their children. That may be the case, but that is not a reason to quell celebration of the guys who are doing what they are supposed to do.

Now, I’ve never been a fan of people who brag about doing what is expected of them. (I bristle with contempt with the guy who says with pride “I take care of ALL of my kids!” Congratulations, you now have done the bare minimum of what is expected of you as a biological entity capable of reproduction.) Yet, we should show appreciation where it is due.


OK, so what to do? Just grab some Old Spice, right? Will Aqua Velva do the trick? How about that tie you saw at the swap meet? No. He deserves better than that. Look, we all know you use a scarf to tie your hair at night, and though that scarf is stained, looks like it has been through World War 3, and needs replacing does not mean you want a replacement scarf as your Mother’s Day present. A guy doesn't want that tie or cologne either.


Do the unexpected. Take his car to get washed. Get his oil changed. Grill some steaks for him. Nothing is better than a surprise—except a surprise that gives him a break from doing what is expected of him. This is great for both significant others and fathers.

Give him a break. This goes without saying, but still someone should say it. Let him sleep in. Tell the kids to give him some space. Let him sit around and watch the NBA Finals with no interruptions.

Cater to him. There was once a time where this was expected of a woman—not saying that we should go back to those times, but fixing him dinner, bringing it to him, and, this is the kicker, asking “Is there anything I can do for you today?” Nothing warms a man’s heart like feeling he is respected, honored, and valued. Hint: don’t just wait until it is Father’s Day to let him know how much you appreciate him.

Thoughtful Gifts. I hope you will give him a thoughtful gift. Only you know your Father or your significant other. Watches, electronics, clothes, even books are all great ideas. 

Make it a celebration. The most important thing, however, is that you don’t just make Father’s Day a five minute gifting event. Make it a CELEBRATION. Make it all weekend long. Extend it to Monday. You can even make it a week long affair with little things done the week after to show how much you really appreciate him.

Celebrate fathers; celebrate fatherhood. We all need encouragement from time to time. This is a day set aside for fathers. Celebrate them.

- Lawrence Ware
(To read Lawrence's full bio, click here.)

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