Shea Radiance Aha Moment Competition

We recently learned about the Shea Radiance Aha Moment Competition, and we were thrilled about it for a few reasons:

1. If you've been reading this blog long enough, or you have read our "About" page, then you know all about our "aha moments" in regards to self-transformation (you can read the original post here ), and that the sharing of such stories fits right into our mission here at PLPT. 

2. GG and I both have natural hair, and we have each posted our transition stories here at PLPT (you can read GG's here and mine here).

3. We want to enter and score those yummy products! We are not involved with the backroom portion of this contest, nor will we have any influence over the selection of winners. So these great prizes are fair play!

Of course, we wanted to share this info with our fabulous readers as well, so here are the details:

Share Your Hair AHA Moment . . . And WIN!

To celebrate the launch of Shea Radiance Hair, we want YOU to share your hair "aha” moment. That’s the moment when you embraced your hair whether curly, fine, kinky, straight or wavy.

Eleven (11) lucky winners will be selected and they’ll receive full sized bottles of the Shea Radiance Hair Kit – Shea Radiance Maximum Moisturizing Shampoo, Shea Radiance Maximum Moisturizing Conditioner and Shea Radiance Hair Milk.

To Win 1) Tell us about you hair aha moment in 200 words or less and include a picture of your mane to customer@shearadiance.com 2) Like Shea Radiance on Facebook 3) Follow Shea Radiance on Twitter.

Best of luck to all who enter!

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Love Note - Friday 11/11/11

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“Find Your Truth” Series - Part I

As we grow older, more mature, and have more life experience, our perceptions of the world, and of our selves, begin to change; and in essence, our “truths” change. What does this mean? It means that we start to have a different understanding of life than we may have had 5 or 10 years prior; what we believed to be true in our teens changes in our 20s. What we believed to be true in our 20s changes in our 30s. And so, we rely on this new wisdom—our “truths”—as we navigate life, with all its struggles, on our personal journeys.

It feels good to release an old way of thinking, and to move forward with an open heart and mind. Sometimes it’s scary to do so until you realize that you’re not alone in making new discoveries. So, in the spirit of sharing, we consulted some wonderful and brilliant women to discover what they have found to be their personal truths as they have worked to become the women they are today. Through the sharing of their humorous, intelligent and insightful answers, we hope that you’ll begin to discover some truths of your own.

In this first post of the series, L’oreal shares what she finds to be true about marriage.

“These are my truths…They don’t have to be everybody’s.” –L’oreal

Marriage

Before you Say I Do

If he isn't your best friend, don't marry him.

Have a girlfriend, cousin or some road dog that will have your back if you decide this isn't what you want even if it is two seconds before you say I do.

Don't try to have your whole life figured out. You will only end up with disappointments. Ideas are ok. Strict road maps are not.

Get rid of all associates, buddies, hookups or what not. Don't bring options (weight) into your marriage. Delete them out of your phone book, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn. Just don't.

Once you Say I Do

Once you say I Do, then Do. Be about your marriage and 100% committed even when the tough times come.

Have veto power over boxers and panties. What? Yep, he is the only one that has to see you in your underthings every damn day. Your lilac boy shorts were cute 4 months ago but now they are faded and stretched out. When you hit the 5 for $25 sale, let him veto the panties he is tired of seeing you in every DAY. But turnabout is fair play. You have the same opportunity.

Say you were wrong and apologize. This is super hard for us women because we normally catch our men slipping but it will happen and when it does just say you were wrong. I have struggled with this (read: still do) BUT I recall the mantra of ‘Do you want to be right and alone or wrong and together?’. You are going to be wrong. Just deal with it.

The quickest way to mend any wounds after a fight or distance between you is food and sex....yep, that simple. Fix his favorite food and hop on top. BAM! You two are made up.

Never and I MEAN NEVER go out of town without giving your man some. Never leave him without. My holy roller aunts from the south taught me that one.

Pray for that man. Pray his strength, for him on his job, everything and anything. He needs your support and prayer.

Make sure there are three beings in your marriage: you, him and God. When you two are pissed you both can turn to God and talk it out with God. God will ensure that you two come back together.

This is my favorite one and it came from my country uncle: “Don't do nothin’ outside the house that you ain't doing inside the house. If your man ain't cutting ya'll's grass, he ain't going over to cut his mama's grass. If you ain't dressing up for your date night with him, you ain't dressing up to go out with your girlfriends.”

Sexually, be what your mate needs. Don't let some other chick steal your hubby because you ain't_____ like he wants. If he likes you to tickle him behind his ears or send him sexts, girl, get to work doing that thing. The marital bed is undefiled. You can be as freaky as you need to be as long as it doesn't break any state laws. If you don't think another chick would do that ________ thing for him?!?!?!? Shoot, don't do it and watch what happens. Plus, when you reveal that you like ______ he will be more than happy to return the favor.

Get a life. No seriously, get a life. During your newlywed phase you will want to be boo'ed up pretty hard. That is a beautiful thing but after that, get a life. Make sure you are doing things without your man and nurturing your relationships that you had before your marriage. Have girl's night out. Join a book club. I have no idea how it is to be a husband but being a wife can consume you. Too many trashy novels start with a wife who has lost her identity. Make sure that you don't lose yours.

Think of marriage as an organism, not an institution. An institution evokes thoughts of a cold, gray cemented place that is restrictive and can be learned because it never changes. Yet, if you think of your marriage as organism it gives you a better picture of what you are really dealing with in marriage. Organisms are constantly evolving into bigger and better things when properly fed. If you are giving nothing to feed your organism or worse putting toxic things into it, then it will die.

Finally, accept that he is not perfect and neither are you. He is going to forget the eggs at the store; leave his clothes on the floor. But he is yours...all yours. Love him.

After You say I'd Do and You Did and God Does

This is one I had to learn too early in my life with the passing of my father. Just for clarification, my parents were married since Noah got off the ark--but the Lord called him home. While you are making your life together, make sure that you are making a life you will be proud of and that the memories you make will sustain your spouse after you are gone. My mother has 3 children, 3 grandkids and 2 son-in-loves, memories galore and a ton of love because of the life she and my father made together. I pray even more blessings for you and your spouse.

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We hope L’oreal’s insight has inspired you to share your truths with us as well. Feel free to discuss in the comments section, or to email us at peaceloveprettythings@gmail.com with the subject “My Truth” and let us know that you would like to be featured.

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PLPT Reading List - November

Read

A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle

It isn’t often that I read a book that completely transforms the way I view myself and the Universe as a whole, but A New Earth was that kind of book for me: illuminating, enlightening and “truth” shattering. In this book, author Eckhart Tolle clearly explains how to silence the human ego, a source of suffering and pain; and how to learn to live in a state of “being” as opposed to “acting” on the ego’s behalf. Metaphors, by way of example, help to clarify the narrative in a way that is accessible to everyone. It took a while for me to complete the book, since I would go back over passages to ensure I had a full understanding, but it was definitely worth taking my time to pore through; I recommend it to anyone who feels like they are working and spinning their wheels without seeing any real results. You can purchase it from the PLPT Bookstore by clicking here.

To Read

Spirit Junkie by Gabrielle Bernstein

First introduced to Gabrielle Bernstein through her blog on the Huffington Post, I was quickly drawn in by the energy that radiated from her posts, and subsequently sought to learn more about her concepts surrounding peace and happiness. I didn’t have to wait long because her first book, Add More ~Ing to Your Life, was released soon after. Specifically geared to young women, Gabby’s book tied together meditation, visualizing and physical movement as a formula for moving your life in a positive direction. And now, she has written a second book, Spirit Junkie, which describes her own journey of spiritual transformation. I’m excited to learn more about her story. And you can too when you click here to purchase.

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Why I Love Being a Mom but Don't Like Parenting

I have recently come to the conclusion that I don't like parenting.  My partner and I have three children and I love being a mom – supporting my children, protecting them and showering them with affection. But I have to admit that I don’t like parenting. In this context, I’m talking about parenting in terms of issuing rules and regulations, constantly lecturing and berating, and instilling fear in them to control their behavior. I don’t like it, it drains me and quite honestly I wish I could delegate it to someone else. I wish I could just let my kids be who they are without having to restrain them, but I realize that they need boundaries.

I was only 24 when I had my first child, and I recall being terrified when the hospital released me into the world with this little bundle of life. Not only was I a single mom, I was also very immature and naive about the world. Although I had a degree and a good job, from an emotional and financial perspective, I felt like a kid. Prior to having a child, I thought of myself as lazy and unreliable. Of course, this perception was skewed by the low self-esteem and self-destructive behavior that defined my late teens and early twenties. I didn’t feel that I took such great care of myself, so I questioned how in the world I would manage to take care of a helpless baby that needed constant attention and care. Despite my fears, my natural instincts kicked in and I embraced being a mother. I loved my child with a passion that I’d never experienced before and that love really fueled me to take better care of myself for the benefit of my child.

Then my baby started to grow up. I had to learn to discipline him. I had to learn when it was time to nurture and when it was time to scold. When does he need tough love? How do I avoid spoiling him? And then four years later there were two babies. I was awed to discover that this immeasurable love could multiply. But then more uncertainty settled in. I still didn’t know which end was up in terms of my relationship, and here we were with another baby. I questioned my ability to teach them the right things. In other words, how would I teach them to not do the dumb things I had done? How would I teach them to be better than me, when I was still figuring out how to better myself? These thoughts clouded my mind with self-doubt and parenting anxiety.

As I started talking about my feelings, I gleaned from other parents that we all wonder if we are doing things the right way. We lose sleep, we pray, and we beat up on ourselves - worrying that we are doing too much or not enough. And how do we measure success? When they become straight A students? When they go to college? When they avoid the pitfalls of drugs and crime? When they become successful in their careers? Is there a right or wrong way to do this parenting thing to get the “results” we want and not screw up our kids? Over time, I’ve accepted that there are no clear answers or universal definitions of what works. So, maybe we should just love our children, accept ourselves for the parents we are and accept our children for the people they become.

What do you think?  Do you or have you ever had moments of parenting anxiety?  Are there aspects of parenting that are harder for you to deal with than others?

I originally wrote this piece as a guest post for Mommyhood: Next Right, one of my favorite blogs about motherhood and life.  I really enjoyed writing it and making sense of these feelings, so I had to share it here on PLPT, as well.  :)

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Love Notes - Friday 11/4/11

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Pretty Things: Lovely Links for Style and Beauty Inspiration

"There is no law that says that

a person of inner beauty cannot

also maintain an appearance."

~Robert Brault

As much as we love everything about peace and love and personal growth, we also love PRETTY THINGS. We believe it's important to take care of yourself inside and out -- and to the extent that you can control your environment; your surroundings should also be beautiful and reflect who you are inside.

We love the following blogs for the daily fashion, style and beauty inspiration that they provide.  Always true to our ethos, we also love these blogs for their focus on self-fulfillment, expression and creativity.

The Simply Luxurious Life was created by Shannon Ables.  She posts loveliness Monday through Friday, and I never miss a post.  They are full of visual and verbal appetizers that remind me that despite how frazzled and overworked I feel most of the time; I'm a graceful and enlightened creature who deserves a luxurious life.  That luxury is defined by me in terms of who I am, how I choose to feel, and how I choose to express myself.   

Here's what she says about how she came to create her blog: "I decided to share my passions, approaches and ideas as a way to help others find their passion in life by clearing out the clutter and bringing in the luxurious necessities that can enliven and inspire each day no matter what one's income, location or situation."


Recent posts you will love: 
 
First, Seek Self-Approval
Style Inspiration
Single or Married: 20 Things to Do

Following Natural Belle on her blog or tumblr will give you all the fashion and hair inspiration that you could ever need.

From her bio: "Natural hair and style blogger since 2008; Belle of Naturalbelle is a British natural who documents her hair journey and highlights natural beauty and style in the mainstream. She describes her blog as "an online magazine inspired by natural hair and fashion with a bit of narcissism thrown in.  Her main aim is to inspire women to embrace their natural assets and highlight the beauty of all natural women."

I get so much inspiration from the beautiful images she shares on her sites.  When I was initially getting used to having natural hair, her site was one that showed me the extensive diversity of it.  More than that, I found her site at a time when I needed to reconnect with my sense of creativity and self-expression.  If you love modern and retro style, fashion and hair - you will love Natural Belle.

Recent posts you will love:

The Inspiration: Halloween
Capsule Closet: Grey, Metallic & Blue
The Icon: Angela Davis

Tiffany was just featured as one of our GEMS last week, and I could not do this post without including her lovely blog.   Her story is so inspirational and should convey to everyone who reads it that it is possible to create the time and space to do the things we love AND get paid for doing them!

From her blog: "ACCIDENTAL Chic is an inside look at Tiffani's life as a fashion stylist and interior decorator. She gives advice for timeless style, along with the latest trends and has a devotion to living a beautiful life." 

We were fortunate enough to meet Tiffani last year at an event in DC and she has a beautiful spirit that compliments her approach to style, interior design and life.  You will find that her warmth and her love for what she does comes across through her blog.

Recent posts you will love:

Mantra Monday
Ask a Stylist: What Wardrobe Staples Should I Have
Pillow Talk


What are some of your favorite fashion, style and beauty blogs?  With so many out there, what makes your favorites stand out??

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